Chris Sabo's face seen in pumpkin pie

Bridgetown—Local residents are calling it a miracle the likes of the Shroud of Turin. Throughout the tristate, Chris Sabo is making his presence felt this Thanksgiving in holiday fare. At least a dozen Sabo faithful testify that they’ve seen the visage of the former third basemen in their pumpkin pies.

What does this all mean? Could it point to a resurgence of the Reds as a World Series contender? Will Sabo himself make a comeback to the big leagues? Is he wearing the Rec Specs? We’re not sure. And neither are the naysayers. Skeptics point to the phony “Jesus in a pancake” and “Virgin Mary in grilled cheese” to discredit the believers.

And opportunists are said to be already exploiting the phenomenon, artificially etching the face of Sabo into pumpkin pies to get in on a piece of the action. Spuds himself decried the wicked forgers, claiming they will face the judgment of his father. Sabo’s dad, however, was not available for comment.