Do losers seem to seek you out?\u00a0 Out of a room full of guys, do you feel you end up talking to someone who turns out to be a deadbeat more often than your share of the time?\u00a0 Do you meet and get attached to seemingly great guys only to find out they are in a relationship, incapable of holding a job, or have a somewhat dark or even criminal past?\u00a0 If any of these questions sometimes linger in your consciousness, let\u2019s explore a little deeper.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n
First of all, remember that we all attract the wrong type of guy because it is a statistical fact that most guys are the wrong type. \u00a0Mother nature and everything else works on a simple bell curve.\u00a0 Hopefully you’re looking for someone considerably above average. So it\u2019s good to look in the top 20% of the bell curve. As guys approach us we turn them down until we find one we feel is right for us. \u00a0This is called selection process. \u00a0They may be the right type for someone else but not for you.\u00a0 This is how the world works.\u00a0 Men make their pitch and we turn them down.\u00a0 Luckily they usually move on quickly and make their pitch to another woman\u2026often the same night in the same bar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But don\u2019t give up.\u00a0 I said most <\/em>guys are not right for you, not all<\/em>.\u00a0 So don\u2019t get a complex.\u00a0 It is normal to be approached by the wrong type for you by a ratio of at least 10:1.\u00a0 \u00a0But if you find yourself getting in relationships with men who later turn out to be low quality dating candidates, keep reading.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We\u2019ve all been fooled by the smoothest, most confident guy in the room.\u00a0 We all need to grow beyond falling for this.\u00a0 Guys with the most to hide (in a relationship, chronically jobless, criminal past, etc.) often work harder at their approach than the normal, quiet, somewhat shy guy sort of keeping to himself.\u00a0\u00a0 Since their goal is to deceive rather than connect, they often have likely rehearsed and perfected their con over a period of years.<\/p>\n\n\n\n As Ronald Reagan said, trust but verify. Before becoming emotionally attached in any way, make sure you get the facts.\u00a0 Be friendly and respectful without being overly receptive until you know more.\u00a0 \u00a0Also learn to trust your instincts.\u00a0 Chances are you\u2019ve been fooled before and you recall a deep knowing sense that something was wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We make our worst relationship choices when we are vulnerable.\u00a0 During times in our life when we have suffered a significant loss such as the death of a loved one or a painful breakup, we are especially vulnerable to making poor dating decisions.\u00a0 <\/p>\n\n\n\n During these low periods<\/em> we seek the comfort from others to help us cope.\u00a0 Recognize these moments and seek comfort from close friends and family members.\u00a0 Try to have the discipline to postpone new dating decisions until you feel confident, stable, and healthy. You will see things more clearly and you will make better decisions.\u00a0 Mostly you\u2019ll have the self-discipline to walk away before things get to serious. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Where and when are you meeting men? Do you meet a lot of men in bars after midnight? There\u2019s nothing wrong with being in bars after midnight but you shouldn\u2019t consider that an ideal setting for meeting new men. Do you meet a lot of men through contacts or friends that you do not have a lot in common with?\u00a0 <\/p>\n\n\n\n Your circle of friends directly impacts the quality of dating candidates you will meet. If the circle needs to upgraded, start making it happen.\u00a0 Your grandmother knows all of this because this is something that doesn\u2019t change.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Do losers seem to seek you out?\u00a0 Out of a room full of guys, do you feel you end up talking to someone who turns out to be a deadbeat more often than your share of the time?\u00a0 Do you meet and get attached to seemingly great guys only to find out they are in […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15],"tags":[20],"class_list":{"0":"post-1365","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-lifestyle","7":"tag-relationships"},"yoast_head":"\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\t\n\t\n\t\n2. The worst guys often have the best pitch<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
3. Periods of emotional vulnerability aren\u2019t helping you<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
4. Situational perspective – Your grandmother told you this one<\/h2>\n\n\n\n