GAZA- Organizers of this year’sGlobal Suicide Bomber Convention inGaza say the event was a huge success. Every year the event attracts highly ranked suicide bombers from all over the world to share experiences and exchange ideas about their hazardous trade. This year the entire convention lastedan estimated1.6 seconds which is a remarkable 16%improvement over last year’s event which ended in 1.9 seconds.This short-lived nature ofthe convention is due to the many highly skilled attendees eager to demonstrate their abilies to their colleagues.
Al Jazeera News reported this year’s convention is encouraging especiallyin comparisonto the tragic 2006 convention when a rogue suicide bomber selfishly attacked the convention prior to the official kickoff. A spokesman for the 2006convention said, “This cowardly attack resulted in theunnecessary loss of so many dedicated suicide bombers who were robbed of the opportunity to display their dedication.”
Insiders say the 1.6 second duration of the convention is an estimate because the precisetiming documentationwas lost when the convention’sofficial timekeeper was blown up during the initial blast. Other observers situated a safe distance from the convention’s ground zero provided the 1.6 second estimate.
Organizers say because it is difficult to decide who to credit with the first explosion, convention planner Mohammed Massoui believes he has narrowed it down to the top five and plans to submit each name to the Suicide Bomber Hall of Fame in Kandahar, Afganistan. Massoui commented, “To have the remnants of yourbomb vest retired and hangingon the cave wall with some of those legendary bombersin Kandahar is the highest honor of our trade. Unfortunately, we are forced to use duplicate bomb vests because the Americans insist on destroying everyHall of Fame we build.”